Love in the Time of Addiction

“Enabling is fixing problems for others and doing so in a way that interferes with growth and responsibility.” Jeffrey Bernstein I am the embodiment of this definition. It’s a painful and repetitive admission, and essentially worthless unless I stop doing it. I claim to want to love without condition–and what …

Crossing the Border

After stopping at the Grand Canyon and filling up my view with the glory of that place, I continued on my way. I stopped just across the border in Needles, California where the 110 degree heat seemed just about right for the sad looking houses and tired fast food signs …

A Return To My Native Land

I moved to Southern Illinois in the summer between seventh and eighth grade. Our family had done a steady slide downstate from the time I was born in Chicago: Chicago. Clinton. Decatur. And then Carbondale. Every three years and always because my father had changed jobs. We were hostages, we …

The Loneliest Road

I drove away from my daughter’s house, feeling a bit unsettled, but with relative certainty that I had not forgotten anything essential. About 30 minutes into the drive I got a phone call from Megan. “Bye!” she said. “What?” “You told me to wait inside and you’d be right back …

An Honest Attempt

I want this conversation to be honest. I’m a big fan of honesty and I’ve prided myself on “rendering to Caesar” and teaching my children the importance of being truthful and straightforward. But honesty is hard, and sometimes cruel and often hurtful to the ones we love. We have to …

Does It Still Apply?

Introduction to Snakeskin Journey, March 2008 My sister and I once ran away to the garage–more of a protest of inhumane conditions (my parents were not impressed) than a bona fide break-out. We’ve all run away before.  And for all the times we did run, there are many more when …